Love By Pilot Light

A week ago, December 4th, it SNOWED in Houston! Yeah, baby. So J got off work early and called the apartments to come light our fireplace. That is what we were told we had to do when we wanted a fire.

However, since it was snowing, the office closed early and she had to leave a message. I couldn't wait to get home to my love and snuggle in front of a romantic fire. When I got home, there sat J, with no fire, still in her work clothes waiting for someone to come light it.

Fast forward to Monday evening. It's around 60 degrees outside. The fireplace lighting call has all but been forgotten. I come home. After awhile, I walk past the fireplace and hear a hissing sound. And I see this:

I called J and she said to call the apartments; however, it was past office hours so I had to call the "emergency number." It was answered by an answering service operator.

"What is your emergency, ma'am?" she asked. "Well, Friday we asked for someone to light our fireplace, but no one came. Someone came into our apartment today when we weren't home and lit it." Then I lit into her. "And it's not even a fire! It's just a stupid little flame like a candle! I can't even see it unless I walked over to the fireplace and look in between the logs!" I was upset. "AND we don't know how to turn the thing off. No one ever told us how!" The fire was supposed to look like this:

Now, see, I'm from the old school, where we chopped our own wood for a fire. I have even chopped down trees to chop the wood for a fire. I have never had a gas fireplace.

Anyway, the office manager came to our door and told us that the "flame" was a pilot light which would stay lit all winter, and showed us the button to push - Presto! An actual fire! Push the button again - Presto! A pilot light.

What an idiot I am! But tonight we will enjoy our romantic fire together with no pilot light.