Sunday, April 5, 2009

The Dreaded Sunday

Well, it is another dreaded Sunday. I just want it to go slowwwwwly. First, we will go to church. May I just say that God definitely chose this church for a reason. You all know my anxiety over taking communion. I always cry; it's embarrassing. Well, at this church, they have been having communion every single Sunday, so I am getting lots of practice. I seem to cry less and right before instead of 15 minutes before. I still need to get over the touching-the-bread-that-someone-else-has-touched phobia. I get a bit obsessed during the week by a man who takes communion twice. Today I am taking my new pen from the bank to doodle with. Hoping that will help me take my mind off of things.

After church, we will go to a dreaded place -- grocery store. This is where I get to see J in action; it is so cute, her with all of her coupons and her list. I always had a list before, but she is so cute at it and takes it so seriously, that I have left that part up to her. Almost makes it worthwhile going to the grocery store just to watch her! And the way she points with her finger, "Now, you go down that aisle and get this, and I'll go down that aisle and get that." I love being told what to do. Ha ha.

We also need to go to Walgreens and Best Buy sometime today. We will read the paper. I'll cook her a nice, afternoon meal. I will watch the clock the way I always do and count down in my head. I am going to try my best not to appear depressed, but in my head I will be dying inside to let it out.

Surprisingly, I was invited to my parents' house for Easter dinner, so I will get to see the girls on Easter after all! My brother and his wife are going to be there; I am very nervous about that. I haven't seen them since before Christmas. Maybe I will get a new dress for the day. I want to look happy and healthy! J and I know that everyone is on pins and needles waiting for us to break up, like this will just pass. I want to show them that it's not going to.

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